Women and their clothing crisis
Wed Apr 20, 2011 8:26 am
#8162- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
As you all know, I'm hardly the morning person as evidenced by past morning statements like "it's not my fault your sister is a whore" and "I don't care".
Well, this morning, I have a new installment of "I just shouldn't speak before 10 AM"
The scene takes place in my bedroom, about 7:15 AM EST
Wife is tearing through closet, I can tell my the diameter of her eyes and the flaring nostrils, that the dreaded "morning clothing crisis" is upon me. I approach with caution:
Me: "You seem unusually irrational this morning (laughs)?"
Wife: "I can't find anything to wear"
Me: "but you just had an outfit on, it looked good"
Wife: "it doesn't match the one scarf that's clean"
Me: "who cares about a scarf?"
Wife: "I do"
Me: "well, I do seem to remember a time where you didn't constantly have some ridiculously oversized scarf draped around you at every damn moment, why not picture yourself in 2010 and do without it, why is it like a uniform at this point?"
Wife: snaps her head in my direction and simply says "really?"
Me: pics up cellphone off table, looks at wife "hey, a grip is on the phone, you need to go get it"
Wife: "nice"
Me: "seriously, you have 5 minutes before I leave without you"
Wife: "ugh"
F**k that...closet full of clothes and it's rendered useless because of a freaking scarf. Yeah. I'm chisa and I don't give a sh*t.
Well, this morning, I have a new installment of "I just shouldn't speak before 10 AM"
The scene takes place in my bedroom, about 7:15 AM EST
Wife is tearing through closet, I can tell my the diameter of her eyes and the flaring nostrils, that the dreaded "morning clothing crisis" is upon me. I approach with caution:
Me: "You seem unusually irrational this morning (laughs)?"
Wife: "I can't find anything to wear"
Me: "but you just had an outfit on, it looked good"
Wife: "it doesn't match the one scarf that's clean"
Me: "who cares about a scarf?"
Wife: "I do"
Me: "well, I do seem to remember a time where you didn't constantly have some ridiculously oversized scarf draped around you at every damn moment, why not picture yourself in 2010 and do without it, why is it like a uniform at this point?"
Wife: snaps her head in my direction and simply says "really?"
Me: pics up cellphone off table, looks at wife "hey, a grip is on the phone, you need to go get it"
Wife: "nice"
Me: "seriously, you have 5 minutes before I leave without you"
Wife: "ugh"
F**k that...closet full of clothes and it's rendered useless because of a freaking scarf. Yeah. I'm chisa and I don't give a sh*t.
Wed Apr 20, 2011 8:48 am
#8167- Kaz--MoneyMember
- Location : Calgary, AB, Canada
My strategy....make a break for the coffee shop and gtfo before she even wakes up.
If you 2 carpooled, it'd be an issue....but that's the glory of public transit.
Every 5 minutes a new one comes by.
Clothing crisis averted.
Sanity preserved.
Manhood intact.
Now you get to drop coins on the floor of the bus and go for those kinky upskirts without the wife killin your steez.
If you 2 carpooled, it'd be an issue....but that's the glory of public transit.
Every 5 minutes a new one comes by.
Clothing crisis averted.
Sanity preserved.
Manhood intact.
Now you get to drop coins on the floor of the bus and go for those kinky upskirts without the wife killin your steez.
Wed Apr 20, 2011 9:09 am
#8176- Kaz--MoneyMember
- Location : Calgary, AB, Canada
This just in:
The Abercrombie "Ashley Triangle Top" has been pulled from their website and likely thier store.
Just in case anyone thinks they need their SEVEN year old daughter wearing a heavily padded bikini top....you might be outta luck for the beaches on 2011.
Seriously....wtf?
The Abercrombie "Ashley Triangle Top" has been pulled from their website and likely thier store.
Just in case anyone thinks they need their SEVEN year old daughter wearing a heavily padded bikini top....you might be outta luck for the beaches on 2011.
Seriously....wtf?
Wed Apr 20, 2011 9:26 am
#8178- VetteBrownie
- Location : Ohio
Women are odd creatures. Even if you tell them they look great they still think you're lying or something. I've come to the conclusion that women try to impress other women, not men.
Wed Apr 20, 2011 9:59 am
#8179- Kaz--MoneyMember
- Location : Calgary, AB, Canada
Some just need to have their compliments come by the dozen....not just as single servings....
Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:05 am
#8181- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
Xx_VetteDude_xX wrote:Women are odd creatures. Even if you tell them they look great they still think you're lying or something. I've come to the conclusion that women try to impress other women, not men.
it's totally a competition thing between them....a lot of the time, I think the men they choose are a part of that competition. How many friends of mine are dating absolute douchebags, when you ask why, they say "he's hot". They wonder why I laugh after they break up and they'll all wallowing in self pity "but whyyyyy".
Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:28 am
#8189- OrrophinMember
- Location : UK
Me: "Your hair looks nice today"
Her: "I haven't changed it"
Me: "I didn't say you did, just looks nice"
Her: "It's the same as yesterday and you didn't say it then"
Me: "FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"
Her: "I haven't changed it"
Me: "I didn't say you did, just looks nice"
Her: "It's the same as yesterday and you didn't say it then"
Me: "FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU"
Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:47 am
#8192- GuestGuest
I'm honestly clueless about what women wear. point is, its because I'm an asshole. tits and ass, is all that matters. BAM!
Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:49 am
#8194- RickMember
Yo what up mah home crew...(grabs imaginary nuts and farts)
Wed Apr 20, 2011 10:50 am
#8195- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
WaLkAwaY wrote:Yo what up mah home crew...(grabs imaginary nuts and farts)
good morning Walk...care to shed any insight on this topic?
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:03 am
#8202- Kaz--MoneyMember
- Location : Calgary, AB, Canada
<kaz goes and pees on a tree>
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:04 am
#8203- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
marking territory again Kaz?
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:08 am
#8204- RickMember
Lol, but I am not a typical female. I do things that make them cringe. I will tell you though that females check out other females and it is so subtle most of the time it almost imperceptible to most especially men. It is even more subtle than when a girl checks out a guy.
I can go to a mall and see girls as young as 8 or 9 looking at a 24 year old and her face says "she is trying to look young, I will be hotter than her when I grow up" or something catty like that.
It depends also on where I am and what I am doing. If I just get off my motorcycle and someone is looking at me it could be because of what I am wearing, how I look or just the fact that I am riding a motorcycle.
Funny side note: Sometimes when I ride you cannot tell what I am. If I have a full face helmet I sometimes will tuck my hair up underneath. I can pull up alongside some guy in his car and he looks at me and I think I just look like a small guy. He probably does as well. I base this off of I can read his face it is not a look of "she is hot" it is a look of envy as he looks in the rear view and stairs at his kids and his wife. Envy because he wishes he could be out and not tied down I do not know.
Or he could be thinking I am hot. Not thinking "I am hot" but rather that a girl on a sport bike is hot, which most guys think that even if she is not necessarily hot herself.
I do not wear clothes that are revealing or show curves I wear clothes that are firstly practical in their design for maneuverability, then comes the comfort factor. You also have to factor in that in my mind I am going to be attacked at any moment so I need to be prepared. That is why i notice everything and everyone and people take it differently, guys see it as being a stuck up bitch and girls see it as thinking I am hotter than anyone else, thus yet again a bitch. Just because I am paying attention to everything and not giving about their clothing or what they have.
Even women cannot win with other women sometimes. If you express feeling at them based on what they are wearing or what they look like they see it as envy or being catty. If you totally ignore them they think you think you are to good for them and thus think you are a bitch. Guys do the same thing.
You cannot win with any of them so I do not try. I keep everyone on the fringe of the peripheral of my senses only engaging them when either crossed or I need to.
I can go to a mall and see girls as young as 8 or 9 looking at a 24 year old and her face says "she is trying to look young, I will be hotter than her when I grow up" or something catty like that.
It depends also on where I am and what I am doing. If I just get off my motorcycle and someone is looking at me it could be because of what I am wearing, how I look or just the fact that I am riding a motorcycle.
Funny side note: Sometimes when I ride you cannot tell what I am. If I have a full face helmet I sometimes will tuck my hair up underneath. I can pull up alongside some guy in his car and he looks at me and I think I just look like a small guy. He probably does as well. I base this off of I can read his face it is not a look of "she is hot" it is a look of envy as he looks in the rear view and stairs at his kids and his wife. Envy because he wishes he could be out and not tied down I do not know.
Or he could be thinking I am hot. Not thinking "I am hot" but rather that a girl on a sport bike is hot, which most guys think that even if she is not necessarily hot herself.
I do not wear clothes that are revealing or show curves I wear clothes that are firstly practical in their design for maneuverability, then comes the comfort factor. You also have to factor in that in my mind I am going to be attacked at any moment so I need to be prepared. That is why i notice everything and everyone and people take it differently, guys see it as being a stuck up bitch and girls see it as thinking I am hotter than anyone else, thus yet again a bitch. Just because I am paying attention to everything and not giving about their clothing or what they have.
Even women cannot win with other women sometimes. If you express feeling at them based on what they are wearing or what they look like they see it as envy or being catty. If you totally ignore them they think you think you are to good for them and thus think you are a bitch. Guys do the same thing.
You cannot win with any of them so I do not try. I keep everyone on the fringe of the peripheral of my senses only engaging them when either crossed or I need to.
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:10 am
#8206- VetteBrownie
- Location : Ohio
First off, women on motorcycles = win.
Second, I wish more girls were like you.
Second, I wish more girls were like you.
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:19 am
#8209- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
alright, that's enough walk...you've given me the final piece of evidence that i need to figure out who you really are
from everything, I can surmise that you're the type of person that's always prepared to rain down violence if necessary, you plan three possible points of egress from any room at any time, you sit facing the entrance to any room as to see your enemies coming, and you're wardrobe is based around carrying the maximum amount of ammunition possible...you either live in the forest of California or, the moon of Endor..not quite sure
get ready for this people, I present to you, WalKawaY's most recent pic from the FBI database
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
and OMG, women on motorcycles are pure sex (and I'm not talking in the Kaz sense of "in a bikini bent over a Ninja or something equally absurd)
from everything, I can surmise that you're the type of person that's always prepared to rain down violence if necessary, you plan three possible points of egress from any room at any time, you sit facing the entrance to any room as to see your enemies coming, and you're wardrobe is based around carrying the maximum amount of ammunition possible...you either live in the forest of California or, the moon of Endor..not quite sure
get ready for this people, I present to you, WalKawaY's most recent pic from the FBI database
[You must be registered and logged in to see this image.]
and OMG, women on motorcycles are pure sex (and I'm not talking in the Kaz sense of "in a bikini bent over a Ninja or something equally absurd)
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:27 am
#8210- RickMember
^OMG, my pics are out!
Wed Apr 20, 2011 11:32 am
#8211- ChisaGod Of Boobs
- Location : Boston, MA
I F'ING KNEW IT!!!!!!!!!
Wed Apr 20, 2011 2:54 pm
#8237- SyndromeAdmin
- Location : Ohio, USA
Totally getting the sarah conner vibe from your post Walky lol.
Nothing more badass then letting the women go dominatrix. MMMMMmmmMMmm.
Chisa, best thing to do in your situation is to not comment at all. GIve her a 10 minute warning, when there is really 20 minutes to spare. This way with 5 minutes left, you can say... We are already 5 minutes late, we gotta go. Then when teh actual time to leave comes... as you are walking out the door right on cue you say:
"I like what you picked out. Goes nicely together".
And so begins your day.
Nothing more badass then letting the women go dominatrix. MMMMMmmmMMmm.
Chisa, best thing to do in your situation is to not comment at all. GIve her a 10 minute warning, when there is really 20 minutes to spare. This way with 5 minutes left, you can say... We are already 5 minutes late, we gotta go. Then when teh actual time to leave comes... as you are walking out the door right on cue you say:
"I like what you picked out. Goes nicely together".
And so begins your day.
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